I'm in love with a brick wall.

you'd think if someone loved you more than anyone else in the world they would stop doing the one thing that breaks your heart. the one thing that made you leave in the first place. yet it didn't phase you at all. how I felt one again didn't matter. not even the fact that I left made you second think it. you continue to push me farther and father into a shell of genuine shit. I hate myself and it has nothing to do with self esteem. no words can explain how I feel. not that it matters because you don't care. don't care don't care don't care. and that's what hurts the most.